Chosen Family

Good Bye, I guess.

Coming, going. 

Never staying. 

See them once in a while.  

But not as much. 

Need some air from this. 

Friends leaving. 

Strangers coming, 

And some never look back. 

I know that it's their life. 

I have to stay in this repeating pattern 

Of people leaving.

I care,

They care. 

There must be a reason 

For me to indirect so much pain of loss.

What I need is 

Someone who leave. 

No, it's what I want. 

Maybe that's the reason I stay

So no one has to feel the same as me. 

I couldn't have made it this far without you. 

Coming, going. 

Don't leave. 

Good bye, I guess.

Everyone has experienced a friend leaving at some point in their life. I was only thinking of my pain when I wrote this poem. One of my friends left my church and my other friend left for boot camp around the same time. The friend that went off to boot camp, she is like my sister and I love her so very much. I am so very proud of her. Even if I haven't seen her 4 months. My other friend is also like a sister to me. I wouldn't change athing. Never ever. I love them both with all my heart. 

I could name 10 friends that have left, even my sisters. Starting in second grade to now. I remember all 10 of their names. Because every friend is locked in my memory. Your friend are too. Friends are our chosen family. I believe that everyone have the power to make friends and then make memories with your family.

Bold, Proud, and Scared.

We all have voices. Even me. I might not say much but the words are there.

I am shy and quiet. I usually don't talk to people. Why I don't talk….it's because I am scared. People have told me that I have no reason to be afraid. But there are many reasons. There are also reasons not to be.

My mom has told me that I have a good since of who I am. That is true yes but if I share myself with others, what would happen? Will they like me? Will they hate me? Will they love me? Will they make fun of me? Would they want to be my friend or my enemy? Does it matter?

I made this blog public to see what would happen. I am putting myself out into the world. Scared. Yes. Bold. Also yes. Going to regret it. No. Proud. Why not.

So this is me, and like it or not, This is my voice.